The Art of the Intake: A Necessity for Death Doulas
Getting Clear on YOUR Unique Offerings and Medicine
Take Time With The Questions I Have Asked You
These modules have provided you with many deep, soul searching questions. The answers will change the longer you live and the more life experiences you have. The exercises provided for you as homework are not meant to be linear, 3D "I understood the assignment" types of busy work tasks. You have nothing to prove here and only everything to gain by putting your heart and soul into your own end-of-life plan.
I had a very clear end-of-life plan until I got married. Now, we are back at the drawing board so to speak, creating a plan with rituals and interment decisions that honor both of our spiritual journeys and belief systems. Having children can also change your end-of-life plan sometimes. Have full trust that even though life happens and plans change, having structure and clarity in place for your final moments is one of the most loving and thoughtful things you can do for your loved ones.
I am sharing live class footage below where we are covering some of the fears and concerns each person faces around the topic of death and the process of dying. In this first clip, I am discussing with Rachel how Past Life Regression Therapy informs our work and brings more comfort and awareness to the death process. I share the intimate story of my own past life healing session during energy work on the treatment table.
But What If You Cry As A Death Doula?
Your tears are a sacred offering to the people you serve. Never apologize for giving codes and downloads through the offering of your sacred waters.
There is a huge difference with being overwhelmed by your emotions vs offering your sacred waters from your heart as a gift.
By showing an example of authentic feeling, you can teach others simply with your presence, honesty, transparency and mastery of your emotions.
Beautiful Example of Intake Answers/End-of-Life Celebration Plan
This is the beautiful vision of one student for your creative inspiration. I hope this helps you create your own unique magic when planning your celebration.
1. What type of ceremony or funeral service would you like to have? List out elements of cultural heritage that are important to you. Any spiritual or cultural influences in your life that you wish represented at your funeral can be listed here. A: I wish to have a ceremony that has a huge musical influence. I would like a like vocalist and accompanied by two strings and a select playlist with covers like “True Colors” arranged in coffee house tones. I would encourage the people that are present in this burial to offer sentiments and thoughts written on papyrus to be included in the burial basket. A group of Bhuddist monks in orange robes chanting Ohm Mani Pad Me Hum. The burial a natural burial with no chemicals and at Carolina Sanctuary, resting at the Pisgah National Forest in Asheville.
2. Are there significant people in your life you would like to ask to speak or have a contribution at your service? List them with their contact information.
A: The people that have influenced my life are either scattered across the globe, or much older than I am now. I would like a video tech individual to capture the ceremony on film and edited to upload virtually so that everyone can return and absorb detail and intention.
3. Would you like to have an at-home funeral, a service at a funeral home, a casual outdoors memorial celebration or a celebration at a venue? Be creative and remember, this is all about honoring your life. Your end-of-life celebration is important therapy for those you leave behind. The more creative and personal you make your service, the more you will assist those you leave behind in processing your transition. A: The venue I would wish to have the event at I would be a The NC Botanical Garden in Asheville.
I would like there to be a medicine wheel there representing the the four stages of life and directions adorned with a few pictures of myself most importantly the 37 countries I have visited. I would like a Tea Ceremony performed and as the ceremony is concluding from Dobra Tea House. In the memorial I would like one or two dancers performing a traditional dance you would see in Cambodia or Thailand with the traditional sounds of finger pianos accompanying.
4. Are there specific songs you wish to be played at your celebration? Would you like someone to sing, have live music or simply have songs played over a speaker? A: In the four stages of life in a music context I would like a curation of music with influence from the 70’s 80’s and moving forward. Soothing musical selection over a speaker piping in.
5. Are there poems, scriptures or passages you wish to have read at your memorial service? A: Footprints in the Sand. Freedom from Bondage, Big Book AA.
6. Do you have favorite flowers or plants you wish included in your celebration? A: Ferns, Calendula, Borage, Comfrey, Poppy flowers.
7. Have you written your obituary? Do you have someone to help you write out your life’s story? What significant milestones and accomplishments in your life do you want to be remembered?A: I have not written my obituary. But I have a wish I want to begin to put into action regarding a life story. But the life story could be shared in brevity with the 4 archetypes we all share in common. Victim, Prostitute,Child, Saboteur. And I would like each of these archetypes to be in the medicine wheel accompanying the individual stage in life that most themes each. A summary of the different masks I have worn with the different achievements in being of service to others.